What Do You Really Want?

by | Jul 5, 2020 | The Success Principles | 2 comments

After you’ve landed on your life purpose, IT’S PLAY TIME! No, I’m kidding…
The next step is deciding what you want to DO, BE and HAVE. This is really fun for me because I have a VERY active imagination!

You’re on your own success journey from where you are to where you want to be, and YOU get to decide what you want to experience, accomplish and acquire. It sounds simple, but unless you take the time to decide what you want, you’ll have a hard time ringing that bell.

Don’t Settle For Less Than You Want

Looking back on your life, you may have been heavily influenced by those who raised you and taught you. You heard “you don’t really want that” or “”you can’t have everything you want…” or “stop being so selfish!” This may have impacted your deepest desires and led you to do things more to please others than yourself – did you go to a school to please your parents or did you take a job based on outside influences? As an adult, you may now revisit your true desires by recognizing your preferences in each situation. To get what you want out of life, remove “don’t know, don’t care, doesn’t matter” from your vocabulary. Then, act AS IF you have a preference when faced with a choice. Break the habit of putting the wants and needs of others before your own. You come from a place of power when you know and act on your wants and desires.

Your “I Want” List

Do you have a “bucket” list? This is a list of experiences or achievements that you’d like to accomplish in your life, usually before you die.
An “I WANT” list is similar – but it’s broken into three areas:

  • Things to do
  • Things to have
  • Things to be

This exercise helps you clarify what you really want. Try to come up with 30 “things” in each category…it’s harder than you think! I STRUGGLED the first time I did this exercise, but then I let my imagination run wild and allowed myself to DREAM BIG! While many of your wants may be material things like your dream sports car or a Maui beach house (on MY list), you’ll also begin to think of wants that speak to your core values, such as “I want to make a difference,” “I want to express myself,” or “I want to feel powerful.”

Your “I Love To Do” List

Do you believe you can earn a living doing what you love to do? Many people don’t think they can, so they hold back from sharing their true passion and desire. Oprah and Ellen are two examples – but I’m sure you know people who ARE earning a living doing what they love. Make a list of things you love to do – as many as you can think of, but try to get to 20. Put on your creative thinking cap and come up with ways you can earn a living doing the things on your list. DECIDE what you want to do, and through upcoming blogs on The Success Principles, you’ll learn more.

Your Ideal Life

Do you have a clear vision of your ideal life? In order to get from where you are in your life to where you want to be, you need to know where you are and where you want to go. Your vision describes your destination in detail – what it looks like; what it feels like. Having a balanced life means your vision includes: job/work/career; finances; free time/recreation; health/wellness/fitness; relationships; personal goals; and contribution/legacy. Get really clear on your vision – where you want to go. When you want to go somewhere in your car, you put the destination address in your GPS system and it gives you the shortest route. Achieving success in your life works similarly when you clarify your vision (deciding where you want to go) and then take action to move you toward your destination. TUNE OUT anyone in your life who doesn’t believe you can achieve your vision (aka naysayers or dream-stealers).

The Vision Exercise

To get really clear about your vision, ask yourself questions in each area – job/work/career; finances; free time/recreation; health/wellness/fitness; relationships; personal goals; and contribution/legacy – to land on the picture of your ideal life if you had a magic wand to make it the way you want it.

Examples of questions in the job/work/career area (from The Success Principles Workbook):
If you could do anything you want –
What would a career based on your life purpose look like?
What would you most love to do as your work, profession or business?
What are some characteristics of your ideal work environment?
Do you want a support team?
Are you part of a collaborative team?
Do you work from home? In a particular city?

Do what feels right for you – dream and visualize first and write everything down afterwards or capture your thoughts on paper as you go through each area. Write down your ideal life in each area and then identify the most important items from each area. Ideally, review your vision at least once a week for 10 minutes, setting an appointment in your planner. Your vision will change over time as you achieve the goals you set, so reviewing and revising your vision at the end of each year is helpful. Share your vision with a trusted friend who’ll support you on your success journey. Don’t fear that they’ll think your vision is unrealistic, silly or impossible to achieve. Most people want what you want – financial abundance, meaningful work, good health, positive relationships, and the chance to make an impact in the world – but they don’t admit they want it. Sharing your vision with others helps clarify it, makes it more attainable and aligns you with resources and people who can help you. Regularly sharing your vision also strengthens your subconscious belief of achieving your vision.

Just remember, deciding what you want is the foundation for building your ideal life.
I challenge you to set aside some time and complete the Vision Exercise today. In the comments below, share ONE THING you’d like to BE, DO or HAVE that you plan to focus on in the month of July.
Reach out if you’d like help with this exercise or if you need other questions to ask yourself as you go through each area to complete your vision.
Don’t forget to DREAM BIG!

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  1. Anna

    Susan, your posts are always so inspiring. After I read every one, I felt a sense of energy to act on something powerful! Thank you for providing us with motivating content.

    • Susan Barr

      Thank you, Anna! I am so glad you are inspired by my blog posts. I hope you will share an action you took after reading one!


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